Purely by Accident – Chapter 38
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With a squeak, the door swung slowly shut behind us.
My arms still wrapped around the princess — rather like a fly clinging to an osmanthus cake — I took a step forward, then another, until I had backed her into a corner of the room.
Her eyes sparkling invitingly, she reached up and wrapped both arms around my neck. Her voice wound its way lightly into my ears, as perfectly soft as those arms. ‘Zisong, what are you doing?’
I made as if to throw her over my shoulder and carry her off. ‘On such a lovely night,[1] my dear madam, with the flowers about us and the moon shining overhead[2]… what do you think a bandit chief like myself might want to do?’
Chu Feichen actually giggled. ‘You must be jesting, sir. What flowers are you speaking of, and where is the moon? I can see neither.’
Ah, my lady had set a trap for herself. Clever opportunist that I was, I look full advantage of it. I placed one hand firmly on the wall beside her head; with the other, I drew her closer to me, then bent down and grazed her lips with mine. ‘Here are the flowers,’ I sighed, in a voice so low it was barely perceptible.
Chu Feichen drew back a little, a brilliant flush spreading across her face. Then she closed her eyes and pressed her trembling lips against mine. They felt faintly cool, like the finest, gentlest, most effective elixir for a hangover.
Her mouth remained completely motionless against mine. I opened my eyes and looked down at her quivering eyelashes, feeling an appreciative pang for all the efforts she was making despite her obvious inexperience. With a little sigh, I closed my eyes again. Then, coaxing those red lips into parting for me, I slipped my tongue into her mouth, teasing and sucking. She tasted of the wine we’d been drinking at the banquet — all softness and sweetness, without a trace of astringency. Her lips were like the unfurling petals of a flower, whose mysterious, enticing fragrance delighted the senses, while I was the scent-addled bee buzzing about her, dipping my head again and again to gather more of that delicious honey to me.
Chu Feichen’s breaths fell unsteadily against my neck; her hands gripped the back of my collar tightly. In the midst of all this, however, she still seem bent on forcing herself to retain some shred of calm. ‘And what about the moon?’ she mumbled indistinctly against my lips. ‘Where is it?’
In that moment, I realised how utterly alluring an inquisitive girl with an appetite for learning could be. I tried to steady my own breathing, then looked down at her. Her eyes were so bright with ardour that I couldn’t resist dropping a kiss between her brows. My hand wandered slowly up to her bosom, and gave a meaningful little squeeze. ‘This is the moon, right here,’ I explained, ever the patient teacher.
The flames climbed charmingly higher in her already flushed cheeks. Her breathing quickened a little, and every inhalation brought the soft, lovely curve of her breast right into the palm of my hand. The sensation set my heart fluttering wildly; I felt as if my very bones were melting.
She flung me a sideways glance. ‘You cad,’ she sighed through her teeth.
It wasn’t as if I’d set out to be a cad. Even if I’d been as enlightened as the Buddha himself, I would still have found it nigh on impossible to restrain myself in front of the princess, especially when she was like this. So I tightened my grip even more, then brought my lips to her ear and whispered brazenly, ‘Mm. The moon feels so round and soft tonight. It must be a full moon.’
Chu Feichen gave a small shiver. Her hand slipped up to my shoulder, a little as if to push me away, but also as if to pull me closer. I ran my tongue along her ear, drawing an ‘mm’ from her. Her hand drooped bonelessly against my shoulder, and she buried her face in the hollow of my neck. She was utterly enchanting, and I, utterly enchanted.
Emboldened, I reached out to undo her robes. As my hand found its way to her sash, I pressed my lips against her ear and said in low, coaxing tones, ‘Princess, princess, it’s such a lovely evening. Will you allow Zisong to gaze upon the moon?’
She was trembling like a skiff caught in storm-tossed waters, but she somehow retained the presence of mind to still my hand with her own. Her face still buried in my shoulder, she murmured coyly, ‘It’s cold…’
Cold? I gathered her even more closely to me with the hand that lingered at her waist. Reflexively I glanced around the room, and saw that each corner held a basin of coals, all of them burning away merrily. In fact, a fine sheen of sweat had already sprung up on my forehead. What could she mean by saying it was cold?
I kissed her earlobe. ‘Why are you cold?’ I asked a little doubtfully. ‘Has all that wine made you break into a sweat? Should I go and get you a cup of hot tea?’
Chu Feichen didn’t let go of me. Instead, she buried my face even deeper into my shoulder, nuzzling against me. Then, in a voice so sweet and yielding it made my heart melt, she murmured, ‘It’s cold against the wall… it’s cold…’
Bewildered, I glanced at her back, which was very clearly not in contact with any part of the wall. Then my eyes fell on her earlobe, which was flushed as brilliantly scarlet as blood. This visible sign of my approaching good fortune finally brought me illumination — I was enlightened, I finally understood. As it turned out, your slow-witted bandit chief had completely failed to take her lady-love’s tantalising hint.
Quickly I tightened my arm around her waist, and said softly, ‘It really is a little cold. Princess, why don’t we continue this conversation in bed?’
And so, to bed.
‘To bed’: a most evocative phrase indeed. The scene it most often conjured up was that of a lonely young wife sitting en deshabille in her boudoir, the curves of her bosom only half-hidden by the folds of her robes, stretching out a hand through the layers of gossamer bed-curtains towards the neglectful husband hard at work at his books, utterly consumed by his hopes of a political career. ‘My husband,’ she would say, drawing out each syllable caressingly, ‘it’s late. Aren’t you coming to bed?’
Oh, what a titillating scene indeed! Do not ask how I know of such things; there are so many erotic novels in this world that your inquisitive bandit chief could hardly be faulted for having read one, or two, or three, all in the name of satisfying her thirst for knowledge. And so I deliberately hung back half a step, waiting for Chu Feichen to get into bed first, so that she could look back tenderly over her shoulder and hold out a hand towards me.
Of course, Chu Feichen had never been an ordinary maiden, and now that we were married, she soon proved herself to be no ordinary wife. She sauntered over to the bed, removed her shoes, and with perfect composure, climbed in. She arranged herself so that she was sitting up with her back against the pillow, and drew the brocaded quilt over her legs. By now the flames in her cheeks had dissipated, leaving them as porcelain-fair as ever. Then she looked up at me with a faint smile. ‘Very well. What would you like to talk about?’
What?
Were we finally going to bed together… only to talk? Oh, my darling wife, how could you play such a cruel trick on your lovelorn bandit chief?
Inwardly cursing all those erotic novels for having so flagrantly misled me, I flung myself onto the bed and landed in the princess’ lap, my legs tangling with the quilt. I rubbed my face against her knee most shamelessly. ‘That’s not what you promised me, princess! I want to gaze upon the moon — in fact, I insist on gazing upon the moon.’
It was blatantly clear what I meant by that. I was still lying facedown on the blanket, so I couldn’t see the princess’ expression, but I did feel her touch the back of my head ever-so-lightly with a soft, sweet-smelling hand. ‘What kind of talk is this?’ she said. ‘It’s hardly proper.’
The best thing about propriety, as far as I was concerned, was the frisson one got in its breach. I decided that if there was an opportunity to do something more… strenuous in the bed we were both lying on, I would seize it then and there, and if no opportunity presented itself, I would create one.
I lifted a corner of the quilt that lay over Chu Feichen’s legs, ducked my head under it, and bit her very gently on the thigh through her robes.
Chu Feichen’s leg quivered. She fumbled beneath the quilt with trembling hands, placed one on either side of my face, and tilted my head. I found myself rolling over, and the quilt slipped free. I ended up sprawled out on my back with my arms and legs spread wide.
I looked guilelessly up into her eyes. ‘My lady wife, your bandit chief is now completely at your mercy. I’m yours to deal with as you please, whether you’d like to grope me, or strip me, or—’
Chu Feichen pinched my nose gently, and rocked my head a little back and forth. Her eyes were so full of indulgence that I could have drowned in them. ‘Be good. Let’s talk for a little while first.’
Fine, then. If talking was a necessary prelude to activities of a more physical nature, then I was willing to play my part in it. It was just that… Oh, my lady wife, the night grows short. With such an enticing main event before us, could we not shorten this prelude just a little, and then just a little more?
I reached out and nudged one of her fingers lightly. ‘What would you like to tell me, princess?’ I asked, looking at her through half-closed eyes.
Chu Feichen began running her fingers through my hair. Each stroke was soft and soothing, and the sensation was altogether delightful. Her face took on a thoughtful expression, and after a while she asked, ‘Zisong, when I slapped you that other day, did it make you so very miserable?’
There was a note of hesitation in her voice.
A sudden ache came over my heart. It wasn’t the slap that upset me, I thought. Quite the contrary: it was the way you drew your hand back. I sighed softly and put on a nonchalant expression, cocking my head to one side. ‘No,’ I said.
The princess straightened my head. Then she leaned over, looking deep into my eyes, and said very earnestly, ‘The next time you take it into your head to pick a fight, find someone you can beat. Don’t you know who Zhao Yishu is? He’s marched across battlefields; he’s trodden over the bones of his enemies. Why would you attack him with your bare hands? Were you trying to get yourself killed?’
I wrapped an arm around her neck. ‘If he was someone else, why would I need to fight him?’ I said, pouting a little uneasily.
The princess put a gentle hand on my cheek. ‘Didn’t I tell you before? “Don’t believe anything anyone else tells you about me. Only trust what you hear from my own mouth”.’
There was a soothing quality to her voice. Without quite realising it, I had already lost myself in it, and I nodded.
She smiled then, and leaned down even further to press her forehead against mine. ‘I’m going to tell you something as clearly as possible, and you should remember it well. Wei Zisong, you’re the one I love. Whether now or in the future, it will always be you.’
That was the sweetest sound in the world.
Something was beginning to prickle at the corners of my eyes and at the bottom of my heart. The princess’ gaze was all undiluted tenderness; I could have happily drowned in the depths of her eyes — nay, I could have spent all my days paddling my little dinghy round and round in them, my oars stirring up ripples that mirrored the fluttering of my heart. Although that would have to wait. Right now, I had something much more important to do.
I nudged the princess forward with the arm I had put around her neck, so that she landed right on top of me. The bed-curtains chose this very apposite moment to swing shut, enclosing us in a small, evocatively-lit space.
I kissed the princess lightly on her temple. ‘No matter how supple you are, your back is sure to start aching after bending over for so long. Princess, have you said everything you wanted to say to me?’
Her hands roamed across my back. ‘What I said to you just now… have you committed it memory?’
I nodded very earnestly, and she smiled, a hint of maidenly bashfulness in her expression. ‘Then I’ve said everything I wanted to say.’
What more could we say, what more need we say? And so, to bed.
I tossed aside her fur cloak, undid her outer robes and let them drop, and peeled away her undershirt. All the while, Chu Feichen gazed tenderly — and a little tremulously — at me. She was unusually biddable, allowing me to do as I pleased, only trembling a little now and again in time with my movements. It was only when I reached round the back of her neck with shaking hands and untied the knot holding up her bright silken dudou that she closed her eyes, perhaps overwhelmed by the reality of what was happening.
The garment fell away, revealing such loveliness that it dazzled my eyes.
Her breasts were truly as full and perfect as the moon. Their peaks blossomed gradually under my gaze — two exquisite, delicate buds, each a brilliant, tender pink. They trembled slightly, as if from shyness. Such beauty rightfully belonged among the glories of Heaven. And had that been so, I would have willingly put my head down and scaled the thousands of leagues needed to bring me to those celestial heights, simply to place a kiss on the splendours I now beheld.
And soon I had my hands full; soon my lips and tongue became very, very busy. Chu Feichen’s breathing became quicker and shallower; a few impatient moans escaped her throat. She thrust her fingers into my hair, and in response to that wordless urging, my lips became even more brazen in their caresses. My tongue found the tip of one breast and traced greedy circles around it.
Chu Feichen’s body tensed against mine, but she still somehow had the presence of mind to tug at my robes. ‘Your clothes,’ she mumbled discontentedly. ‘Take them off.’
My lady wife had given me a command, so naturally I hastened to obey. In no time at all, I’d stripped myself of every stitch. Then I caught up the quilt and drew it over both of us, pressing my body closely to hers. There was an intoxicating fragrance about her hair, which drew me irresistibly; I took one of her earlobes into my mouth and suckled on it again and again.
Her skin was unimaginably smooth and soft against mine, and I gave my hands free rein to wander where they would. My lips lingered for a few moments at her throat, then began making their way downwards. Every single inch of her was beautiful — almost too much for me to drink it all in. My lips roamed worshipfully across that exquisite landscape, leaving marks of my devotion in their wake.
When Chu Feichen finally arched her back, rubbing herself unconsciously against me, I slipped a knee between her legs, right against her hot, hidden core. I thought I could feel wetness.
Chu Feichen clung to my back as if for dear life. A string of moans rose involuntarily from her parted lips.
I leaned down and brought my lips to hers, trying to soothe away her helpless trembling. My hand, however, made its way unhesitatingly downwards, to the source of that wet heat. I gave her a few gentle, teasing strokes, then slipped two fingers inside.
Her entrance was tight; her brow furrowed suddenly. Bracing myself, I thrust my fingers all the way in. Through clenched teeth, she let out a moan that held in it something of pain. ‘Mm…’
Pressing my lips to hers, I drank in every single one of the sounds she was making. My thumb traced circles around the little bud just above her entrance, soothing away any discomfort. Her breathing grew gradually more and more ragged. When she opened her eyes, I saw that they were misted over with need; ardour rippled in their depths. My own breathing was becoming increasingly laboured as I thrust my fingers in and out. With each movement, I could distinctly hear the sounds of wetness.
Atop the bed a woven-grass mat sits
With silken quilts warding off autumn’s chill.
The sheets grow cold, although the day’s yet warm.[3]
Well, I had seen to it that my lady’s bed would not be cold, and the night was yet young.
Some considerable time later, the candle finally burned out, leaving the room in full darkness. Chu Feichen’s voice came to me through the gloom, a low whisper with huskiness to it that was altogether mesmerising. ‘You… you’re not going to take them out, are you?’
‘What?’
She lapsed into silence.
‘What is it, my lady wife? How can I possibly know what you mean if you won’t tell me?’
‘Wei Zisong, your… your fingers… you’re not going to take them out, are you?’
‘Oh. Did you mean these, princess?’
‘Mm… ah… Wei.. Wei Zisong, you… you’re going to keep moving them… aren’t you…’
Well. On such a cold winter’s night, it was good to keep moving.
***
Footnotes:
- In Chinese, the chengyu 良辰美景, literally ‘good time and beautiful scenery’. It originates from the foreword to a collection of poems entitled To the Crown Prince of Wei’s Yexia Literary Society (拟魏太子邺中集诗) by the poet Xie Lingyun (谢灵运), who lived and worked during the Northern and Southern Dynasties. The chengyu is often used to describe a place and time that is suitable for romance. [return to text]
- In Chinese, the chengyu 花前月下, literally ‘in front of flowers and under the moon’. It originates from the shi poem ‘Age and Illness’ (老病) by the Tang Dynasty poet Bai Juyi (白居易). The chengyu describes a place that is suitable for romance. [return to text]
- These are the last two lines from the shi poem ‘Already Cool’ (已凉) by the Tang Dynasty poet Han Wo (韩偓). In Chinese, the two lines read as follows: 八尺龙须方锦褥, 已凉天气未寒时. The implied subject of the poem is a beautiful woman yearning for her absent lover. For the first two lines of the poem, see footnote 2 to Chapter 8. [return to text]
douqi 随笔 